A Six out of Ten

It’s been more than a week since you’ve asked for me

Longer still since you’ve held me

It’s feels like a breakup 

Though I was never your woman

Just a convenient bed mate

Someone, I assumed, you saw as a six out of ten

Not an eight and definitely not an eleven

I’m average at best

Not pretty enough to make you think twice about not responding to my texts

It’s a never ending cycle with men

Me wishing for more

And getting treated like a whore

Doesn’t matter how good I can suck dick

If you aren’t into me

Then there’s no chance of loving me

Even if I can make you wet your pants

Without touching you

I’m cursed with great moves 

And slick hips 

A small mouth and curious eyes

Waiting for you to ask me a thoughtful question

Waiting for you to say that my mood wasn’t an issue

That you will care for me even when I need a tissue 

Or three

My womanly emotions getting in the way of your happy ending

I wish you could have handled that

Wish you could have handled me being real

Because I’m sick of fake men

Aged out youth

Immature even when society calls you a man

You got a few years on me

And yet….and yet….

I’m still just a hen

in your game of chicken

You didn’t even think twice on if I was worth it

Just fucked me as long as you could take me from the back

And the minute I turned around to ask you if you loved me

You acted like I was crazy

For thinking that sharing my body was something amazing

That loving you was on my mind

Making you think I was careless with my feelings

Like opening my legs for you was just expected 

Because I’m a six out of ten

And girls like me,

No matter how real

No matter how funny

Can’t be more than the mattress that cushions their back

Or at least that’s how I took it

When you didn’t call me back. 

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